Is This What It Is?

Okay, turning 49 was a bit wierd, I admit. But the really interesting thing has been the changes in my body over the last 4 months. It has seemed to happen overnight though that has probably not been the case. Just that I am not spinning and running in a crazy cycle so...now I know that I am not just flushed, I have hot flashes. And now it is not stress it is menopause that is waking me up every 2 hours during the night and making me not fall asleep. And now i know that my digestive issues are not stress and taking a laxative is part of being nearly 50. So, HOLY COW!

For the first time ever, I feel like I am a stranger in my own body. Couple that with packing and moving and cleaning and every now and then trying to look for a job and it is pretty crazy. Standing outside of my body watching myself. Who is this person?

Oddly, only when I interview do I feel like myself. I feel intelligent and reasonable and like I can add value.

Moving in with Donna next week and hoping for some more centered quiet time, more focused job and life searching, more excercise and cooking time and of course more creative and crafting time...

Life....who knew?

5 on 5th (or the 8th...hey it is close!)

Ugh! I am a horrible blogger and I blame it on Facebook. The free time I have I have been playing with Facebook which is more interactive. So, sorry....my to do list is HUGE!

Lots going on. Getting caught in the last United RIF was definitely not a total surprise.But even when something is not a surprise, it does not always feel good. Ouch. Not wanted. But somewhere in this chaos I feel like I have been given a chance (again) to sort of get my life back. My former boss told me, the first time I saw him after he left, that he was sleeping well, excercising, getting in touch with people, engaging, hanging out with his kids and spending quality time with his wife. Not please, tell me what is wrong with that. The bigger problem is, how come we don't do all of that when we are working too.

So I have a more clear idea of what is important to me which is actually pretty helpful in this search.

Let's face it: the bucket list is a viable thing. Life has a beginning and an end. So why spend most of that time unhappy?

Five Things on the Fifth:
5. Definitely fall, possibly winter. We went from comfortable upper 60's to 40. Just like that. The furnace is now on. Ugh.
4. New doors swing wide open -- a week of interviews and contacts going well.
3. Getting ready to move...why does this always come back around and why am I not more prepared.
2. Getting over the sinus thing and trying to get over the insomnia
1. Feeling more blessed every day. Good things do happen in our lives..we have to be willing to see them.

Happy (almost) Halloween~

First Sign...

Rita was out doing her morning business this morning (I managed to sleep to 5:30 a.m....woo hoo!) and we noticed this sign of the changing weather...beautiful in the morning light.

Happy Sunday!

5 on the 5th - Happy Birthday to Me!

Okay, so I originally chose Five on the Fifth because, as luck would have it, my birthday is on the fifth. I think of it as sort of my lucky number though I will say lots of wierd things in my life have happened on the fifth. Anyway, here it is.

The Fifth of September, 2009. My 49th birthday. Pretty darn quiet but sort of nice....

5. FOOTBALL...yes the official beginning of the college football season which included a victory by my alma mater (if you can call a 63-0) blowout a victory...ugh!)
4. A bone for Rita - hey she is my best companion so I thought she deserved a present.
3. Phone calls and well wishes from lots of people from all areas and times of my life!
2. a lovely dinner of steak, potatoes, and a savored bottle of 7 Deadly Zins
1. a leisurely day of crafting, shoppping, tv watching and not much else....not a bad way to start my 49th year!

Serious Catch Up

Wow...it has been quite awhile. And I think it has been quite an August. Loss, change, new opportunities, housework...you name it. Too much to cover in one post so we'll start somewhere. Let's start with the general theme: change. As my friend LCB said yesterday, "God was showing me the signs and I was not getting it so he took matters into his own hands...". Well said. That was definitely the case at State Farm and likely the case at United. I could not let go on my own so he rolled me right into the RIF.
But hey...because he did that I managed to do the following in August:
- participated in a craft fair and found out about some others
- went home for my dad's birthday and hung out with Shella
- found a storage place and moved all of my empty moving boxes there
- was able to open some of the other moving boxes and find long lost items
- cleaned and cleaned and cleaned
- continued to clean and engage in a serious bout of mice wars (more on that in another post..)
- did some beginning organization of said possessions
- went two days early to Creative Escape and hung out with Amy and KAK and Kim and just had fun...umm..and did some shopping too (cough cough).

Of course now it is September and now I seriously have to get my act together. But at least I had an August which allowed me to regroup a little. Right before my 49th birthday. More about that later :-)

Happy Birthday Daddy!

In the sense of equal opportunities, Happy Birthday to my dad. Rita and I travelled down the road a piece this weekend to swelter in Dad and Ann's house (apparently one must swelter a bit before one can turn on the air!) but otherwise enjoy a semi relaxing weekend. A few highlights:

- dinner with Shella....our favorite Chinese!
- a few new pieces of paper and some Tim Holtz stamps
- hanging with the kiddos
- helping Dad with the computer
- finally pizza and salad with everyone...
- a long drive home behind semis and motorcycles and other crazies...oh well!

Good weekend and happy Monday. More photos soon..

This is starting to look familiar

In the great book holding the grand plans for all of us, someone is turning a page again. Below is the picture of my fortune at the Chinese restaurant last Sunday. I picked two out of the basket and gave one to Donna. This was mine.

I get it, God...or chinese government, one of the two of you.